


In your veins

by horrorriz



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Angst, Dissociation, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Ed trapped in Oswald's body, Fighting, Hallucination!Ed, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, Nygmobblepot, Shared Consciousness, Sharing a Body, Things get a little heated, but nothing actually happens, did, forcing them to deal with each other's real truths, split personality, yet - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-19
Updated: 2018-11-19
Packaged: 2019-08-26 00:27:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16671277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/horrorriz/pseuds/horrorriz
Summary: When Ed decided to shoot Oswald on that pier, he had planned to get rid of the man who betrayed him once and for all. He had not expected to instead find himself so close to him that they would be forced to share consciousness of the same body.This truly was a prank pulled by fate itself.





	1. Dream encounter

**Author's Note:**

  * For [verovex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/verovex/gifts).



“Oswald?” A voice asked, it felt like it was miles away but at the same time impossible close.

   
Everything felt like a strange haze, something that couldn’t quite be placed. Looked like it too, blurry, unfocused surroundings, making it impossible to pinpoint even the vaguest locations of his own whereabouts. ...Who’s whereabouts exactly?

   
“Oswald, is that really you?”  
Reaching out for a shape hunched in front of him, the voice asked again. He took another step, despite being so close it already feeling like he was wrapped around his very soul.

   
It was odd how strangely familiar it all felt, yet it was completely foreign, even somewhat alien with the bizarre setting of it all. Certain he had been in a similar dreamlike state he tried to remember but he… Couldn’t. Like there was some sort of wall blocking the memories from coming to him.

   
The mysterious other shape remained immovable and unresponsive, sitting down with his arms wrapped around his legs.  
He kneeled to put his hand on the man the shape really was. Not getting a responsive at first, he put his lips against his ear and whispered one last time; “Oswald? It’s me.”

   
Finally it went up for him.  
“Ed? But… How?” Oswald asked but kept his eyes down, thinking he was better off that way, if he didn’t see his delusion, perhaps it would linger.

   
“The reasoning is not the concern at the moment, not as much as your well being. How are you feeling?”

   
“I’m... “  
Suddenly it was like everything snapped back into place, recollection flooded back to him like the water he suddenly found himself surrounded in again. He was swirling around, being thrown from side to side in the strong streams, feeling he was slowly being ripped apart by the water alone.   
Until he found himself wrapped into a pair of oddly familiar strong arms, holding him close and safe to shield him. The water was still tearing into him but the soothing touch that seemed so near it almost felt like it was a part of him was grounding.   
Together they held onto each other, clutching on for dear life in order to endure, survive. And Oswald didn’t know if would have been able to cling to the fragile thread life if it had not been for that comforting presence.

   
“That was you?” Oswald finally asked, looking up to face the gaze of his friend and savior.   
He felt himself filling up with a warmth of gratitude, baffled over the heroic deed. That he would do that for him… _Why?_ It didn’t make sense, something didn’t feel right, like a piece missing.

   
“Wouldn’t be more than right, would it. You saved me, remember?” Ed replied, giving Oswald a warm smile going all the way up to his eyes. A soft expression of what could only be described as a wholesome awe and compassion for the other man.

  
  
Another flashback seemed to hit both of them simultaneously, placing them back inside the manor. Ed was dressed in Oswald’s gold embroidered gown, sipping on the mayor’s mother’s herbal tea remedy for a sore throat. A act of gratitude for saving his life from Butch earlier that evening.  
The memory sped up, playing the events in a rapid speed now. The smile on Ed’s face… The hug, his warm arms around him. Around them. It was like they were feeling the memory together. Like they were bystanders but also feeling it in first person’s view all at the same time. Enchanting, buzzing and whimsical.  
Then another set of feelings were added, gratitude and a deep burning… Desire? He could feel himself getting flushed, or was it Edward? Everything was spinning and none of them could tell inside from outside, or which feelings belonged to whom. It was all swirling around in a mess of adoration and unexplored chemistry that came bubbling to the surface, mixing like blood in water, the arousing bitter taste of wine intoxicating them.  
Which led them to tangling their limbs together, reality -or was it a dream? -stirring together into one, lustful kiss of flaming passion.  
They couldn’t tell the were one began and the other ended. All there was were them together, tasting the sweet aroma of their lips, drinking each other up like they had been thirsting for centuries.

   
As abrupt as it all had started, everything was swallowed by a sudden dark silent nothingness, and with that it was all gone. So were the memories of the phantasmagoria that they had found themselves trapped in, and the feelings they had drowned in.


	2. Wake up call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oswald wakes up in a big greenhouse together with an awfully cheerful redheaded woman, and it soon goes up for him that things are far from as they used to be.

**_“This will be the cold blooded murder of someone you love._ ** **_  
_ ** **_It will change you!”_ **

 

***

 

“Wakey wakey Pengy!” Chirped a bright and cheerful woman’s voice.  


“ _It’s bright, too bright, rightout blinding. Why is it so light?”_ Oswald thought to himself, slowly trying to pry his eyes open through his seemingly glued together eyelids.

  
_“Prolonged state of unconsciousness or exposure of secluded darkness will result in difficulty for the_ _retinal ganglion cells to adjust their photosensitivity and causes the reaction of sudden blindness.”_ Another voice mumbled, not certain if he was simply replying with an explanation to Oswald or for himself.

 _  
“Who… That voice? Am I… Still dreaming?”_  
  
  
_“I wouldn’t believe so no… It seems like my concerns have been verified…”_  
  
  
_“What does that mean-”_

   
Their internal conversation was interrupted by an item being shoved against their chest, Oswald’s chest?  
Standing before him was a woman, or a girl really? He wasn’t sure, the way she acted made him see something childlish in her eyes. She had long bright ginger hair and smiled with so much light Oswald wasn’t sure if he had ever seen such gleeful innocence in this cursed gloomy city before.

  
“Here! This tea is a mixture of mine consisting of mostly asparagus, willow bark and a hint of chamomile to help your body take up all that lost fluids. Neat huh? Plants are so amazing, don’t you think?”  
The woman shined like she had done a divine favor by taking Oswald in.

   
Oswald stared into the grimy heated drink poured into a mason jar with disgusted skepticism. Did she expect him to, drink this? It looked like sewer water more than anything, although the smell was far more pleasant than the looks.

   
“You’d think that with all the water in your lungs when I found you, that a drink would be the last thing you needed but you were asleep for quite some time and I figured you might probably be dehydrated…”  
  
  
“I’m sorry… What? Who are you?”

   
“I’m Ivy! You know the one who saved your life and stuff. It was really a close call now when I think back on it… That fresh wound on your stomach looked really nasty and the blood wouldn’t stop flowing. I also had to get all the water out of your lungs and let me tell you that’s not an experience I would like to redo...”

   
Oswald watched her put a finger on her mouth and glance to the ceiling in a classic thinking expression. Who did something that, was she really a child?

   
_“Excuse me I happen to do that and it’s a legitimate way to focus your thoughts in order to regain a memory.”_ The other voice added.

   
“Lucky for you seaweed makes an excellent makeshift compression until I was able to get you back to my headquarters-”

   
“Oh shut up.” Oswald snorted.

   
“Excuse me?” Ivy turned to give the small man an offended grimace.

   
“I wasn’t talking to you.”

   
“Then who-...” Ivy trailed off, realizing that he was obviously still suffering from some mind delusion, still in recovery. She needed to be patient and not just snap at her new friend right away and scare him away. “How do you feel?” She added instead, in a much more optimistic tone.

   
“What is it to you?” Oswald frowned his nose and looked her top to toe a second time, really giving her the judgement of his disbelief that she would have cared enough to have saved him.

   
“Oh nevermind me having spent the last few weeks caring for your unmobile body, nursing you back to health, feeding you. Helping you get your strength back. Of course I don’t care for your well being!” She pouted and stomped her foot in anger before turning her back against Oswald in protest.

   
All she got as a reply was the Penguin frowning more before attempting to stand, only for his legs to give way like they hadn’t been used for long. Was she telling the truth, had he been here for weeks?  
He tried to remember what had happened, but it was like there was a blank space missing in his brain, or a wall preventing him to reach the content. Why did that feel familiar...  
“Where is Ed…” He mumbled more to himself than to the woman still with her back against him, instinctively thinking of the most important man in his life as the most urgent need of disclosure.

   
_“I am right here, what are you talking about Oswald?”_

   
The mystery voice stated again, the voice… That voice. Edward!  
With a painful shot much like the one he’d taken into his abdomen, everything came flashing back together, he clutched to his torso as the painful memories hit him, then reached to clasp both his hands around his neck, remembering the drowning.

   
Nygma seemed to have a similar realization and felt his hand trembling, dropping the gun in his hand, falling to his knees… Then darkness, as if the memory simply ended there. How was that possible?  
And why did his stomach hurt? What was the clenching, sharp pain in his chest?

   
“You shot me! You tried to kill me you… You…!” Oswald screamed, grabbing onto Ivy but all he could see, all he could _hear_ was Ed’s weak evasions.  
  
  
_“You know exactly why.”_

   
Ivy ripped Oswald’s hands from her and proceeded to push him away.  
“I don’t know who shot and left you to bleed out and drown in that river was but it surely wasn’t ME!” She yelled back into his face.

   
The Penguin snapped back from his hallucination and the face of Edward had been replaced with Ivy’s real features. Instead he stood behind her, his tall frame towering above her wearing a greedy smirk of victory.  
“No, HE did!”

   
“Who? Pengy? We’re the only ones in here, who are you talking to?”

   
“Can’t you see him? He’s standing right behind you!”

   
Ivy turned to look over her shoulder, right at Ed.  
“Nope, no one there. Maybe the lack of oxygen affected your brain worse than I thought… Hold on while I go fetch some herbs to stimulate reanimating brain cells.”  
With that statement she left the room.

   
Suddenly it went up for Ed what was going on, why everything felt so odd. Sure he was used to dissociating but this was different, this felt like when _he_ took over and Ed was left suspended as a mere bystander of his own body acting without him.  
He was trapped, inside Oswald.

   
“What on earth are you talking about?”

   
_“Oh don’t start, you know exactly what this is.”_

   
“Would you please just LEAVE? You should be grateful I’m not in physical condition to kill you at the spot right now.” He was getting truly aggravated at the usual stubbornness this man had to nerve to express at all times, acting as he was all superior and all knowing.

   
_“That’s the thing Oswald.”_ He took another step closer to the smaller man. _“I can’t.”_

   
“What do you mean, you can’t. Just put those long giraffe legs of your to use, walk out of here and never come back.”

   
Ed smiled down the floor with a small smirk, chuckling softly. _“Ok. Watch me try.”_ He turned around, back against Oswald and walked in the direction of the exit of the big greenhouse.

   
When he was finally gone Oswald allowed himself to sigh in relief, he had started to worry what would have happened if Ed had snapped back to him while he was in such a weakened state. He might not have been able to defend himself and perhaps this time, Ed would have been able to finish off the job.  
But his alleviation didn’t last long until a looming presence breathed over his shoulder, making Oswald jump in surprise. He spinned around and once again, stood face to face with a smirking Ed who had simply reappeared in the opposite direction of where he had walked off.  
“Impossible.”

   
_“Not when I’m not actually here.”_

   
“Stop it with your endless games, Ed.” He didn’t get to kill him only to pull stunts like this, it was low, even for Ed.

   
_“Fine. As you wish.”  
_One last comment and his physical form was gone in a flash.

   
_“Though I’m not certain how much of a help it would be. The only difference is that you won’t be able to see me. Makes you feel even more insane, doesn’t it?”_

   
Ed merely whispered, but it sounded as clear as if it were coming from his own mind? Oswald couldn’t wrap his head around what was happening other than the obvious fact that he was still dreaming, or perhaps Ivy had been right with his head being all messed up.  
The obvious and most logical solution would be to get some more rest, so he headed back to bed, curling down under the stiff crochet blankets. He closed his eyes, expecting some peaceful solitude with the world closed off from his sight.

_  
“Not gonna find much luck with that I’m afraid.”_

   
_“Get out!”_ Oswald replied, in his own this time instead of screaming out in the void of the real world where no one would reply anyway.

   
_“Believe me, I would if I could. I’m afraid I don’t even have a proper explanation to why this is happening. But this is Gotham right? Stranger things have occured…”_

   
_“Would you at least shut your big mouth?”_ Oswald pulled the blanket over his head, as if it would somehow be able to mute the persistent voice inside his head.

   
_“What good would that do? You’d hear my thoughts just as clearly as my words. If my words isn’t in fact my thoughts. It’s all somewhat to one’s perception in a matter like this.”_

 

The redheaded woman came strolling back into the room, as cheerful as ever.  
“Feeling better? Or maybe… Worse. Do you feel ill?” She raised her brows in a thoughtful frown.

   
“No.” Oswald didn’t feel in the mood to be chatty, especially with the new voice in his head that would never shut his mouth or ever spinning mind. How could Ed stand being in his own head if he were to be like this?

   
_“Well it’s not like I have much a choice, do I? Though I must admit it is… Relaxing to be rid of that constant nagging of, him.”_

   
_“Him?”_ He couldn’t help himself getting curious, suddenly having a chance of literary picking the mind of Edward Nygma.

   
_“You know if you’re gonna be like that there’s no way I’m going to tell you.”_

   
_“That’s fine, I can just look for it myself.”_

   
_“There’s certain thoughts I’m able to… That I’ve learnt to hide even from myself, so I wish you the best of luck to find them.”_

   
Ivy absentmindedly fluffed the leaves of a nearby plant, gently tracing the green veins with her fingertips.  
“Or are you just tired? Do you want me to leave? I can come back later. I just thought after having slept for so long you would want to be awake for a bit… Catch up you know?”

   
“Catch up?” He considered the option, what did he need to catch up on? He had been missing for weeks, but his mayorial career was already ruined. The shard that was left of his empire, surely could wait another day for him to pick up.  
“Not at the moment.” He replied with a mumble under the blanket.

  
“I’ll… Leave you to it then. See you in a few hours.” She gave Oswald a shy strained smile, still insecure with the whole situation while trying to grasp the crime lord’s strange behavior. If he wanted to be alone, she wouldn’t deny him that choice, she would be nearby if needed anyway. This was her home after all, among all her green friends. It was a sanctuary for sure, her very own. Just that it… Had felt somewhat lonely lately. Upon finding The Penguin on that shore, barely alive. In the confusing condition what was her new life she had yet to get used to, it had given her purpose. She had found herself a friend, maybe even a mentor to help her figure herself out, be someone in this city at last. She would show them, she would prove to them all that she could look after herself. That plants were much more powerful than anyone ever gave them credit for.

  
  
When she had left, Oswald decided it was time to ask the most important question of them all, the one he knew was nagging at the back of both their shared minds.  
_“If you are here, does that mean that you’re dead?”_

   
_“I… That’s a very good question. I got to admit I have no memories of dying, or why that would be. You don’t think that I...?”_  
The last he remembered was being on his knees, the gun falling from his hands before it went all black.  
He gasped at the realization, he had… He really had… But why? That also still didn’t explain why his consciousness had been locked inside the shell of Oswald Cobblepot of all people. Or perhaps that was exactly why, this was his punishment. Then why! WHY? Would he be punished when it was OSWALD who had betrayed him, killed the woman of his dreams, his soulmate!

   
_“I can hear you just as well as you can hear me. I believe this is a two sided curse that way.”  
_Despite his harsh words, Oswald couldn’t help but feeling concern for Edward. Even if it did indeed make no sense why their souls had been merged in this bizarre joke of fate.

   
This time Ed didn’t reply, he was far too submerged into the dwellings of trying to figure out his own reasoning for such drastic actions.

   
Which allowed Oswald to, with his mind finally somewhat calmer and as quiet as it probably could be with this new reality, fall into a deep slumber.

 

***

 

Oswald found himself in a dream much like the last, one he thought to had forgotten. But as soon as he entered the dreamstate, the memories of the previous experience came back to him. While the awareness of the actual reality faded.  
In a way there were two realities, the illusion of a dream with all it’s truths and pleasures, and the dreadful supposed real world of pain and cruel memories.  
No wonder Oswald’s unconscious decided he was better off shielded from the far too painful one.

   
Why dwell of regret, guilt and betrayal. When you could lose yourself in your most deepest  of desires, the ones you do not dare voice or even acknowledge on the outside the depths in the pit of your own mind. Where only they existed, together as one unity. A reality they understood each other’s actions and forgave the other to give place for what they both wished, the connection they craved.

   
After all, once they woke, it would be all gone again. Better indulge themselves fully while it still lasted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the start of a fic dedicated for a dialogue prompt given by Vero, and while I'm not at the actual quotes yet, we are slowly getting there.
> 
> It's all a bit of a mess, this. And it's the most dialogue heavy I've ever written. They can do as much internal dwelling as they like, but it turns into conversation easily when there's always someone listening you know.  
> Who knows how these two are to possibly get along stuffed together in the same body, sharing each other's thoughts. When they barely get along separately.  
> Or perhaps it will do them some good?
> 
> Please give kudos, comment, bookmark, subscribe or whatever <3 I appreciate it.


End file.
